How Did We Get Here (6): Things Would Never Be Quite the Same

Writers: Eimi, Suzee
Date Posted: 19th December 2017
Series: It takes Time to Love

Characters: U'kaiah, Tavia
Description: U'kaiah hopes Tavia will take things better than Aileyan...
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 1, day 14 of Turn 9
Notes: Post 6 of a storyline
Mentions: Aileyan, G'nir

Tavia

~~~FLASHBACK TO M7D11T7~~~

U'kaiah could still feel the sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach
as he walked towards Tavia's door. Aileyan had been so angry. But he
had seen Aileyan angry before. She would learn to accept that this
was just the way it had to be for a while. He was sure of that. She
didn't mean it when she said that if he left she would not take him
back... Well, that was just the anger talking. She would see. In a few
months he would be back, and she would understand he had not abandoned
her.

But as he stopped in front of Tavia's door, he couldn't help the
slight shudder up his spine that maybe she might respond in a similar
way. He knew it was ridiculous. It was Tavia after all. She at
least could listen to reason.

"Tavia?" he called as he opened the door to her weyr.

"Hi," she greeted him with a smile and rose from the floor where she'd
been playing with their son. "How was your day?"

"Hard," he admitted. U'kaiah couldn't help the small smile that
pulled at the corners of his lips at the sight of Kaiavin. **Shards,
what am I doing leaving all this?** Taking a deep breath, he reached
a hand out to her. "I need to talk to you."

"Sure," she said with a puzzled smile. "Weren't you going to be with
Aileyan tonight? I thought..." her voice trailed off as she reached
for his hand.

"Something has happened up North. Please, sit down with me," he said,
pulling her towards the couch with him. U'kaiah gave her all the
details of the tragedy that had befallen the Weyr, and of Hygalia's
assessment of the situation and the gold rider's connection to the
it all. "She has decided to leave Dragonsfall to be their Weyrwoman."

Tavia blinked and blinked again, she didn't quite know what to say,
this was huge! "But she just rose! How can she..," her voice trailed
off at the look on his face. Her heart began to beat rapidly as she
sensed this wasn't all that was happening. She shook her head at him.
"That's not all is it?"

"No, my love, it's not," he said squeezing her hands. "Hygalia came
to me last night to tell me of her plan to go. She swore me to
secrecy since G'nir had not yet been given her final answer. Their
Weyrleader is injured. He will recover, but until then, there is no
real leader at the Weyr with any experience as either Wingleader or
Weyrleader. Hygalia thinks that I would be a good Weyrleader for her
until theirs has recovered. She asked me to go with her."

She looked into his eyes searching for something she knew was there,
his sense of responsibility and drive. Those qualities had always been
a part of what had attracted her to him. Yet now they were pulling him
away. "How long," she asked in a quiet voice.

"Maybe half a turn? Just until their Weyrleader recovers. It should
be before Hygalia's gold Rises again." U'kaiah searched her face for
any hint of the anger that had turned Aileyan against him.

She propped her elbows on her knees and dropped her face into her
hands. Struggling with the emotions roiling through her she tried to
set aside her anger at being left out of the decision making. It
wasn't as if they were weyrmated after all, though she had crossed
half of Pern to be with him here at Dragonsfall. "So, what about us,
me, Kaiavin?"

"I'll be back as soon as I can. And I'll visit as often as I can.
I'll write. You can come and visit me. The time will go quickly, I'm
sure of it," he said, wanting to reach out to hold her, but after the
way Aileyan had rejected his touch, he was unsure of what to do. "I
need you to understand, I don't _want＿ to do this."

"We've done that already U'kaiah," she said as she circled a finger in
the air. "We didn't like it when I was at Dolphin Cove but I moved
here to be with you." She shook her head and her voice rose finally
she threw her hands in the air. "Shardit," she exclaimed slapping her
knees and rising to pace in front of the couch. The thing was, she did
understand but she didn't like it. Not one little bit.

Now it was his turn to hold his face his hands. Would he lose them
both? "Tavia, there was no way anyone could have predicted this. But
that Weyr is leaderless and Thread is still Falling. It's my _duty_
to go."

"_I know_," she yelled at him. "That doesn't mean I have to _like_
it!" Kaiavin startled, immediately started crying when his mother
yelled and she felt instantly awful for having done it. "Sorry," she
shook her head at U'kaiah apologetically and bent down to pick up the
little guy. She bounced to sooth him and murmured in his ear. "Its
alright."

"I don't need you to like it, Tavia," U'kaiah said, raising his head
to look at her. "I just need to know that you'll be here when I come
back."

She looked at him silently for a moment, eyes filled with pain. But
she nodded one short nod and then turned her back to take the baby
back into her room to try and put him to sleep. She knew her pain was
selfish and what he and Hygalia were trying to do was important. But
that didn't make it hurt any less.

It wasn't the bold declaration that he had hoped for, but it was
certainly better that how things were left with Aileyan. He rose to
follow her to the room. "Tavia, can I hold him for a while?"

"Sure," she said and handed the fourteen month old to his father.

"Dada," Kaiavin murmured sleepily as he changed parents and laid his
head against U'kaiah's shoulder.

"It's ok, little man," U'kaiah said softly, rubbing his back. How big
would Kaiavin be when he returned? How many milestones would he miss
along the way? The bronzerider had been determined to be a part of
this son's life in a way he hadn't been when Kaiafel was small. But
those had been his plans. Fate had other plans. "I promise, Kaiavin,
I will only be gone as long as I have to be. I'll be back as soon as
I can. Just remember, your Da loves you."

Her eyes filled with tears wondering if he'd keep his promise. She
didn't have a reason to doubt except the pain their separation would
cause. she took a step closer and put her own head on U'kaiah's chest.
"This is really hard," she said softly.

The bronzerider wrapped his arm around her and laid his head on top of
hers. "Yeah. It is." And he couldn't help but feel things would
never be quite the same again.

Last updated on the December 21st 2017

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How Did We Get Here (6): Things Would Never Be Quite the Same