Give Me Time

Writers: Emma, Miriah
Date Posted: 19th February 2020

Characters: Teseada, Ninaine
Description: Ninaine and Teseada talk about future plans and it doesn't go well.
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 1, day 24 of Turn 10
Notes: Mentioned: N'call, Kapera

Teseada

Ninaine

Ninaine finished brushing her damp hair, feeling refreshed from her morning
bath. The common bathing pools were thankfully not very occupied in the
first candlemark of the morning, so she'd began to make a habit of visiting
them then. She badly missed having a private bathing chamber, but that
thought led only to frustration and loneliness. Pushing those thoughts
aside, she concentrated on her hair, pushing back the thick strands from
her face. It was only a sudden surge of interest from Luneth that caught
her attention.

}: Onnyth has arrived. :{

Ninaine turned, then hurried out to the small ledge of her weyr to look.
She could only think of one reason why the gold would be suddenly arriving.
Goldflight, which meant Onnyth hadn't risen first and without Haloth with
her, it meant he was chasing whoever had.

"Are you there?" called out Teseada "Can I come in?"

Ninaine turned, surprised that Teseada was coming to see her out of
everyone else in the weyr. "Yes, come in." She slipped back into her tiny
weyr, picking up a blanket from her only chair and laid it on her bed to
make room for the goldrider.

"I'm sorry I didn't send word ahead, but when Riyanth picked this morning to
rise, I had to get Onnyth away," explained Teseada. "And the watchrider here
said where you had moved to, so I thought I'd come and see how you are
getting on with the babies, if that's okay with you. I can just go if it's a
problem."

"It's alright." Ninaine gestured to the chair, offering it to Teseada
before sitting on the end of her small bed. "I figured that's why you
were here. It was about time for one of them to rise." She glanced
around the small weyr. "It's not a problem. Luneth is flying a bit
better now, so they moved me from a ground floor weyr and into this
one. It's at least got stairs to it since I'm not riding her yet. I
don't need that much room."

She gave a half-shrug and rose, walking to the small cradle that held
the sleeping infants. "We're doing okay. I was about to take them down
to their foster mother for the day." She only kept the babes a few
evenings a sevenday, relying on their foster mother for most of their
care. Carefully, she lifted Nican and trying to make sure he remained
sleeping, cradled him carefully. "Would you like to hold him?"

"Please, I'll be able to tell Tecall I met his baby brothers, although he's
still too young to really understand." Teseada reached out for the babe.
"Would you rather I sat with him?"

She handed Nican to Teseada. "If you want. He just ate, so he'll stay
sleeping" Ninaine returned to sit on the edge of her bed, studying the
other woman. It was so hard not to feel resentful of her, spending
every day with N'call...sleeping with him every night. It felt more
and more like Teseada was N'call's actual weyrmate and she the
interloper. But Ninaine kept it to herself, falling back on ingrained
courtesy towards her visitor. "Are things going well at Barrier Lake?
I only hear bits and pieces really."

"By the end of today we'll know who the Weyrwoman and Weyrleader are, and
thank Faranth it's not Ashela. I don't know what you might have heard about
her, but it's probably all true," Teseada said as she gently cradled the
child, before sitting with him. "He looks like his father," she said.
"N'call makes that face when he's asleep too."

"I haven't heard much about her, honestly. Are you very upset that Onnyth
wasn't first?" Ninaine bit the inside of her cheek...hard. That last comment
stung; Teseada certainly got to see _that_ more often lately than she did.
Unable to remain sitting, she rose moving to the cradle to look down at
Ninall as he slept. The identical brother also had that slight furrow in
his brows when he slept, much like his father. "I know. They both do."
She tightened her fingers on the edge of the cradle before exhaling slowly
and picking up the sleeping infant to carefully cradle him in her arms.
"Callaine looks the same when she's sleeping."

"How's she doing?" asked Teseada, taking the chance to deflect away from the
issues of who rose first. It did bother her a little, but Kapera was a much
better choice to lead than Ashela, and out of all three goldriders, she had
the most experience. "I think Tecall misses her. He was asking for his
'sissa' the other day."

"She's doing well, actually. She doesn't like the boys too much right
now. I think she's a little jealous." She began rocking Ninall from
side to side, finally smiling a little down at him. "She doesn't want
much to do with them. But I'm sure she misses Tecall too, but as far
as I know, she hasn't asked for him. It could be that it's because
Yanley has a son that's just a little older. He plays with her
sometimes. She misses her father, though."

Teseada smiled at the babe she held as he shifted slightly in his sleep.
"Have you considered a transfer? To be closer?"

Ninaine turned to look at Teseada, surprised. "Teseada, do you really
think that I don't want that? Luneth can't between yet much less fly long
distances. Until she's cleared to do that, I can't transfer any where."

"There are ways, Onnyth and Haloth could bring Luneth /between/ with them,
you must know that."

Ninaine blinked. "I...I actually hadn't thought of that. " Could that be a
possibility? Would Luneth consent to being carried? Why hadn't N'call
suggested that himself? She moved to sit again, brow furrowed. "I guess that
could be an option."

"Then we could help you with these two, and Callaine would see her father,"
Teseada said logically. "And," her voice trailed off as shew wondered if
this was the right moment. "N'call and I, we were thinking about trying to
give Tecall another brother or sister, and if that happens, we'd appreciate
your help."

"Oh." The beginnings of the smile that had started on Ninaine's face
slowly dropped. "I see." She rose, pacing back to the cradle to
carefully lower Ninall back into it. She stood still for a long
moment, fingers flexing around the edge of the cradle as she struggled
to find the right words. When she turned back around, Ninaine had
managed to smooth her expression and she measured her words carefully.
"Are you his weyrmate now, Teseada? Because it feels like you are. The
agreement he and I had was that he could see you and anyone else as
long as he came home to me at night, but he's not even doing _that_
anymore. I see him _maybe_ a couple of candlemarks a sevenday. Maybe.
He comes to home to you now, sleeps with you and is with _you_ every
day. You see more of him than I do. Both of you have decided to have
another baby outside of a flight and make a larger family between the
two of you, without even considering how I would feel about it while
I'm here by myself... Am I supposed to just accept this too, because
it's 'Weyr ways'?"

Her voice broke a little and she took a quick breath to steady
herself. "I like you, Teseada, I really do. Don't think that I don't.
I think you're a good person and that's why he loves you. And I really
hope that you both can have the baby you want." She stepped forward
and gently pulled Nican from her arms. " I'm sorry, but I think maybe
you should go. I have to think and figure some things out."

"I'm sorry," Teseada managed to say as she got up. "I, We, didn't think."
Yes, their plans were unconventional by even weyr standards, but there was
no reason in her mind that they couldn't work this out somehow. She'd
thought that if Ninaine knew of their plans, that she wouldn't be so upset
and might even help them. "Please talk to N'call if you can."

"Why?" Ninaine rocked the little baby in her arms. "So he can tell me
that I'm wrong for thinking that way?" She gave a choked little laugh,
then started a passably good imitation of N'call's voice, " ' Ninaine,
this isn't the hold, this is the Weyr and you can't expect things to
go the same way. This is between Tes and me and you're just being
jealous.' " And she could admit to herself that she was. She knew
N'call loved her but words spilled out regardless. "I've been made to
accept _so_ much, Teseada. Down to these stupid trousers that I have
to wear. And when I finally think I'm going to be okay, Luneth got
hurt and I can't even be a real rider anymore. And then he left me
while I was pregnant to follow you. And I was so scared and miserable.
How am I supposed to feel?" Finally tears trickled down her face and
she sat on the end of her bed. "I've been so lonely, Tes."

"You don't have to be," Teseada said walking over to Ninaine. "You can talk
to us about this, about anything. Having N'call and our children in our
lives makes us family."

Ninaine looked away and held Nican a little bit closer to her even as
she hurriedly wiped her face with the back of her free hand. "I don't?
Well, that's easy for you to say. You're there with him. I'm not.
You're more important to him than me. And right now, I'm
angry. I'm hurt and I'm angry and I'm trying not to say things I don't
mean." She looked up at Teseada. "Maybe later we can talk. But not
now, okay?"

"Well I'll leave, but if you need me, you know where I am. For anything, I
mean it," Teseada said as she began to leave. "Really, I do."

"I know." Ninaine slowly nodded. She couldn't blame Teseada, not really.
"Maybe soon, just not now. Give me time. "

Last updated on the May 31st 2020

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Give Me Time