Idleness is Not Bliss

Writers: Miriah, Suzee
Date Posted: 1st August 2021

Characters: Bryvin, Lusilk
Description: Bryvin and Lusilk talk about her duties now that she's with child
Location: Sunstone Seahold
Date: month 10, day 7 of Turn 10
Notes: Mentioned: Olov, Lorican

Bryvin

Lusilk

Out of habit, Lusilk didn't make an appointment to speak to Bryvin.
Instead, she was waiting in Bryvin's darkened office after dinner had
been finished and cleaned away. Staying still and in a unlit corner of
the room, she leaned against the wall, eyes distant as she mused about
her current situation.

Bryvin came back to his office to return some hides he'd been studying
and paused on the threshold before turning a glow near the door. His
eyes swept the gloom as he stepped further in. "Who's here," he asked
in a low voice.

Lusilk stepped out of the shadows almost immediately after he'd
spoken; this time she wasn't testing him. "It's just me." Her voice
was a bit amused. "Habits are hard to break."

He relaxed slightly and closed the door. "I'm sure," he half smiled.
"You need something, I take it."

She fingered the healing cut on her lip and matched his smile, though
hers held less amusement. "I needed to speak to you." Her nose
wrinkled in frustration. "On Lorican's behalf it seems. About my debt
to you."

He walked around his desk and dropped the documents on it then leaned
against the wall with his arms crossed. "So speak," he said and his
smile faded.

Lusilk briefly explained Lorican's complaint about her recent
sparring. "He's an idealist, Bryvin." She hissed through her teeth,
frustration evident even as she rubbed her rounding belly out of
instinct. "He wanted to speak to you himself, but this is between you
and I. He's worried about harm to the babe and me being gone while
nursing. He seems to think you'd allow him to repay my debt through
his craft. I can't get it through his head that it's not that simple."
Her lip curled. "He doesn't understand this type of debt. "

"I got that when he asked me about visiting his son at the Weyr," he
watched for her reaction to that one before he continued. "I would not
ask you to endanger your babe Lusilk. Trust me that far. Nothing is so
imminent or critical that it must be handled at this moment."

"I trust that. " She agreed, not reacting at the mention of the Weyr.
"So what duties would you have me do here until the child is
weaned?"

"Your husband's service is contributing enough to the hold for now. He
is right in that. But I'm guessing you're bored and want something to
do?" He lifted an eyebrow. Bryvin had plans for the long term but
nothing that required her special and unique talent set at the moment.

Her arms crossed over her chest as she considered the question. "I
helped the Headwoman at Barrier Lake, but it was a larger, more
extensive duty and she needed the assistance. I don't believe your
Headwoman would welcome interference or more assistance than she
already has." She grimaced, feeling tense and as though pent-up energy
were about to boil from her very skin. "You know my other talents,
which would cause more problems than not with my current condition
right now." She pinched the bridge of her nose. "But it's still my
debt, not Lorican's. I don't want or need him to repay what I owe. "

Bryvin nodded at her comment about Yriadha. He'd no doubts Lusilk had
known of his relationship with the headwoman and he had confidence in
her ability to keep her mouth shut about it. But he didn't have the
same confidence in Yriadha finding out about Lusilk's skills. "I'd
prefer you stay away from her as much as possible. I also understand
your wanting to pay your own way but some of this is coming from your
lack of understanding the way the Hold works. Everyone who lives here
contributes to the success of the hold in some fashion. You are doing
so now," he gestured at her pregnant belly. "And that is provided for
simply by being a resident. It's not like the holdless where you must
prove your worth daily." He pushed off the wall and pulled out his
chair. "Lorican's craft benefits the Hold for many times his own keep
so in that way he provides for you and Silgan. When the time comes
that I need your skills, I will not hesitate to call on you but until
then you can provide for your son and husband just by being there for
them."

Lusilk blinked slowly, trying to absorb what Bryvin was telling her.
The thought of being provided for, not making her own way was foreign
to her. She couldn't just do... nothing. The next few months might be
torturous trying to keep herself occupied. She paused, drumming her
fingers on her arms. "I assume that there's no objection to me
sparring with Polson after I give birth. I can't get rusty with my
skills if I'm to be called on. "

"Of course, nor do I expect you to get rusty. But do not confuse that
with imminent requirements that might endanger you, your husband, or
your children. Feel free to continue to spar with Polson. Take a
moment to breathe and relax in the bosom of your family. I'll warn you
in plenty of time if I need your services. Is that clear enough?" He
smiled and this time the humor reached his eyes. "You understand our
arrangement and that is good enough for now. Enjoy this break. You've
earned it."

"Aye it's clear." She exhaled, making an effort not to rub her belly
in response. For all of her thoughts of retiring into comfort, the
realization of actually _not_ doing anything was eye-opening. Why had
she thought it would be easy? She had no idea what to do with herself,
nor had she ever considered being cared for by another. She eyed
Bryvin and debated her next question carefully. "I think I know you
well enough, Bryvin. How is it you handle being cared for by your
women and staff without going mad from boredom?"

"I have a job here as Lord of a very prosperous Hold," he said mildly.
"That consumes my days. Trust me, I'm never bored. The fact that I
don't have to hunt or cook or sneak just gives me more time to manage
this," he spread his arms to indicate the entire area. "I have people
who manage food, others who manage farms and trade goods. Polson and
eventually you fto manage sneaking." He smiled. "A beautiful young wife,"
his smile widened... "who loves me. Life is good."

Her own smile was wry, "And a mistress or two for your other needs."
She then sighed, wrinkling her nose. She was beginning to think she
wasn't made for a life of idleness; her marriage hadn't been meant to
be more than keeping her son safe. It still served that purpose, but
she hadn't been prepared for the very real changes that it brought.
"Very well. I suppose I'll just be...idle."

He shrugged with a smirk, slight tilt of his head, closing eyes and a
wave of fingers to acknowledge her point. "It won't be that bad if you
actually do relax for a bit. I know it feels unnatural but you may
find you come to like it from time to time." He walked around the
desk. "We've had some good and bad times, you and I," he said as he
placed a hand gently on her shoulder. "Here you can have more good
than bad." He slid his hand slowly over the back of her shoulders to
give them a light squeeze. "Your husband is a far luckier man than he
knows."

"Hmph." She accepted the touch without batting an eye. Bryvin had
touched her far more intimately than that in their shared past.
"You're buttering me up and you're far too good at it." The squeeze
wasn't rejected, despite her mild complaint. Still the mention of
Lorican, her husband, made her stiffen just slightly, but not for
dislike of him. "I killed him, Bryvin. I killed Varlin." Her voice
was soft, almost flinty as the realization came to her again. "This
marriage of mine was for Silgan, not for me. Not for Lorican. "

"I know," he said to all of what she'd just said. Just two words to
acknowledge the depth of her pain. "But I've found that something that
happens for convenience can sometimes become something... more. If you
allow it."

She wasn't sure she wanted it to, if she was completely honest with
herself. Lorican had no idea who Varlin had been to her and she
planned to never tell him. The grief was still fresh and she didn't
want to think about it. And, he was so...idealistic and sometimes so
naive that she wanted to shake sense into him. So instead, Lusilk
just gave an "Mmm," in reply, then stepped away. "As soon as I heal
from birth, I'll continue sparring. I won't wait longer than that. "

He still smiled and nodded. "You don't have to decide right now.
Remember, no plan survives contact with the enemy." He smiled more
broadly. She was the one who had told him that one.

Last updated on the October 1st 2021

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Idleness is Not Bliss