Loves Lost Lorn

Writers: Eimi, Paula
Date Posted: 24th January 2013

Characters: Zelanka, Benaroy, Petriv, Eikurn
Description: It's Petriv's turn to be nostalgic.
Location: Amber Hills Hold
Date: month 12, day 7 of Turn 6

"Would you like some eggs with your sausage?" Zelanka asked, busy at the
stove. She was making breakfast. It was restday morning, so she was making
them a treat.

"Of course I do, love," Petriv replied. Sitting at the table, he savoured
the aromatic smell from his fresh mug of klah and just enjoyed watching her
bustle. They were the perfect image of an old married couple. Too bad that
image was a lie, always had been. Still, Petriv could only count himself
lucky, how many men she cooked breakfast for? Not many...if any. He doupted
she ever had the chanse with the other ones...the other ones, his thoughts
twisted and turned in a lazily. They both had had other ones. Who ever they
had loved, it was not each other. Nowadays, they were like best friends.
They care for each other and knew each other so well. But it wasn't love.
Both of them had been forced to look for love else where. He because he
just couldn't love a woman. Faranth knew he had tried, tried to love her as
man should love her. But just couldn't. Many times he had considered
setting her free, but had always balked. He was a sharding coward. If he
had abandoned her, run off with someone he loved, the scandal would had
destroyed her and the children. Or perhaps not, perhaps Benaroy could have
protected her somehow...The Lord Holder always had special eye on her. But
if he had left her, he would have lost her children. He would not been able
to have the pleasure to be father and grandfather. Somethings were more
important than happiness with a lover. He found himself sighing.

"Something wrong, Petriv?" Zelanka asked.
"Just remembering, you know loves lost and lorn," he replied. She gave him
smile that was filled with sadness, remembering her own lost love. That was
something the both shared. Loves lost... But she had someone to look after
her...

~*~ ~*~ flashback ~*~
Petriv sighed with contentment and gave him a sweet kiss. Nothing like a
moment with your love...and hot sex in hayloft. With vague feeling of
guilt, he lifted his head to check his surrounding. He had barred the door,
so noone should be able to surprise them.

"Relax, nobody comes here this time of day," Eikurn said and stoked
Petriv's hair. His skin was still covered by sweat and the muscy smell of
sex cling to them.

"Sorry," Petriv murmured. "It's just...I have wife and children, and this
isn't supposed to happen..." not to mention it was not approved in the
hold.

"'shh, love," Eikurn murmured. "Just enjoy these stolen moments." He was
aware how brief they were. He should get to work soon, his shift was
starting.

Fifteen minutes and quick wash in a cold water bucket later they left.
Petriv opened the door.
"Send me a word when we can next meet," he asked.

"I'll sure do, my dear. I can't live without you," Eikurn replied and after
quick kiss they left their separate ways.

The man who had kept his eyes fixed on the door since it was barred melted
back into the shadows. He had the information he had been sent for. Now
it was time to report back to his master and be given his orders.

~~**~~

Lord Benaroy stood at his window, looking out towards the distant amber
hills, bathed in twin moonlight which cast incredible conflicting shadows
across the face of them, almost as if they were fighting for supremacy over
the darkness. He did not even turn when he heard a sharp knock on his
door. "Come!"

"My Lord," the loyal guardsman said as he slipped into the room with expert
stealth. "The man's name is Eikurn. He is a Journeyman under Master
Namiral. As he left his shop, I detained him. He is being held in the
Lady Tower. I have spoken to no one of this. The guards on the door do
not know who is inside."

"Send the guards away. I will be there momentarily," the Lord Holder said
with a nod. As his chief spy, Benaroy knew Draunes could be trusted, but
he did not want any of the others to know what they were about this night.

Eikurn sat and stared the wall. He couldn't believe this was happening to
him. It must be some sort of misundertanding. Or maybe he was having a
nightmare.

The heavy door was pulled open and the Lord Holder ducked his head as he
entered the room. He couldn't help but look the man up and down warily.
This man was hurting Zelanka. This man was his enemy. "Journeyman
Eikurn."

"My Lord!" Eikurn jumped to his feet, even more bewildered and nervous.

"Sit." There was no room in Benaroy's voice or stare to argue. He looked
the man up and down, feeling his stomach turn in disgust. Petriv having
another woman might be understandable, but knowing what he had done with
this man... "You have committed unnatural and abominable acts with the
Journeyman Petriv, even so recent as this afternoon, have you not?"

"I..." Eikurn opened his mouth and then didn't get the words out. He just
couldn't tell a direct lie when the Lord Holder obviously already knew the
truth and he just couldn't make himself admit it either. The guilt was
deeply ingrained in him. His mouth closed with a snap. He glanced furtivily
around himself, his fingers curling to fists. He trembled. Loyalty to his
lover and quilt were warring inside him.

At least he was showing good judgement in that regard, Benaroy thought as
he took to pacing the room. "You are not from Amber Hills. Where does
your family come from?"
"From Opal Cove hold," Eikurn replied.

"Good." That was far enough away. "I think it's time you return to your
family, Eikrun. And without delay. I of course will pay for your journey,
and will make sure your belongings will be sent after you. But you are no
longer welcome in my Hold, nor will you ever be again. Is that clear?"

"Ye-yes, sir," Eikurn replied. He wasn't a fool, he knew what was going on.
At least they weren't dragging him to a cellar to beat him up. "Can
I...can I leave a note?" he asked timidly. He was thinking Petriv and
feeling miserably betraying him like this. No matter how much he loved him,
he loved his own health even more. He could only guess what they would do
to Petriv. That made his stomach knot up and he felt like throwing up.

"Yes. But in it you will tell Petriv that you have heard a former lover is
ill and you have realized you still have feelings for him that you tried to
bury, but cannot now deny. You are going to be with him, and will see
Petriv no more." The rather tall Lord Holder bent down to look the man
directly in the eye. "Hear me now. The only reason I am not giving you
_both_ up to the decent people of this Hold to escort you to our borders is
because of the great respect I have for Petriv's wife. But if you ever try
to contact or see Petriv again, I will not only tear him away from his
children and banish him from my Hold in total disgrace, I will make sure
the people of Opal Cove will know the truth about you, and that your family
will share the same shame."

Eikurn found his remark about Petriv's wife peculiar, but he was too smart
to ask or comment. He just nodded mutely.

Benaroy stood to his full height with a satisfied nod in return. If the
journeyman had any sense at all in his twisted little brain, he would not
test the Lord Holder's resolve. "Draunes!" The faithful guard peeked his
head into the door at the summons. He listened intently as his
instructions were explained to him in full and then with a bow, left once
more.

"Write whatever letters you will, but do not seal them. Draunes will do
that for you after he reads them though," the Lord Holder said, turning to
his prisoner once more. "They will bring you a bed to sleep on tonight.
In the morning, my man will escort you to your room to collect what things
you will need for the journey, and then escort you down to the docks, and
will not leave your side until you reach our borders. As promised, your
expenses will be paid, and your Master will be told that a family emergency
has pulled you away. You will keep your knots, and your reputation, but
only as long as you keep to our agreement. Understood?"

"Yes, my lord," Eikurn was being very humble boy.

Benaroy turned and walked out the door without a word. That man was not
worth the breath it would take to utter them. Part of him wished Eikurn
would break his promise so that he would have an excuse to get Petriv out
of Zelanka's life for good. She deserved to be happy with a man who could
truly love and appreciate her the way _he_ would have done had he not been
the Lord of the Hold. He knew better than anyone how Petriv caused her too
much pain over the Turns! But the truth was, he feared setting her free.
He wasn't sure he could stand by and watch her fall in love with another
man, no matter how deserving.

~*~ ~*~
Oh, yes, loves lost and lorn, he had those. He had always known that Eikurn
didn't leave him just by whim. Any more than he could leave Zelanka for a
whim, not even for Eikurn. Or Benaroy. No matter what, she was his wife.
They were tied together by the children and grandchildren and forty turns
of sharing a life.

Last updated on the February 1st 2013

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Loves Lost Lorn