The Gift

Writers: AL
Date Posted: 25th June 2013

Characters: Kaya
Description: Kaya opens the gift Wirnan threw away.
Location: Amber Hills Hold
Date: month 13, day 30 of Turn 6

She had been tired, tired enough that Kaya had fallen asleep almost as soon as her head hit the pillow. She had awoken later, but it was still night. Her throat was parched and it pulled her from the bed so she could fetch a glass of water. The pitcher in her room was empty, so she went out to the main one to get some from there.

Wirnan was gone. The couch where he had been spending his nights was empty and it didn't look as if he had slept there at all. Where had he gone? Perhaps back to the festivities. After all, she hadn't been good company.

Her lips tightened. Why should she be? She was leaving soon after all. She could finally be free. The woman turned and procured her water, then drank. Her eye fell upon the wastebasket. It had been empty when she had gone to bed, but now something was within. She plucked the item from inside - the box that he had offere dto her earlier.

To be honest, Kaya had forgotten about the gift. She had meant to open it upon her return, but the night had whisked it from her thoughts. The box was damaged. That coupled with the fact it was in the wastebasket alerted her to the fact that Wirnan was upset.

Kaya drew over to the couch and lowered down onto it. Why had he gotten her a gift? What was it? It was too small to be any sort of supplies for drawing. For a moment, she contemplated leaving it. After all, why should she open it? But her fingers had their own mind and opened the box.

The contents inside were undamaged, but what she saw made Kaya's heart beat a little faster. Within was a beautiful locket. Even in the low light it seemed to gleam and wink at her. She pulled it from within and found two items beneath it. They were drawings. One was a portrait of Wirnan, the other of her old locket - the one that now lay inside against her breast.

Her eyes closed and the flash of another face swept through her mind. He'd given her a locket too. He'd given it to her to remind her of him and his love for her. He had loved her. He'd cared for her. He'd been good to her. He...

And what about Wirnan? Her eyes opened to fall upon the shining gold. After all she had done. After all the heartache, from her ambush, to pushing him away. She had been up and down for so long. She had hated to see him hurt, but at the same time she couldn't stand to be caught, to be trapped to be...

But was she really trapped? Wirnan had been good to her. He'd never hit her. When he'd found out about her drawing, he'd encouraged it. And yet, despite that, her thoughts had kept going back to freedom. Freedom...but what did that mean?

And then there had been that moment of passion. She had wanted it, oh shards yes she had. Then the baby. He'd been as torn up about the child as she had. He'd shed tears over the wee one. He'd lost weight, gone hollow, and her anger and grief and despair had only renewed her desire to flee - only that time not from him, but from the memory.

No, but also from him. She couldn't lie to herself. It wasn't because he had been unkind, but because she had lost a part of herself, and a piece of him. Something that had been alive and kicking within her. Now she was gone. And when she saw him, she couldn't help but wonder what their baby would have looked like. How much of him would have been in their child?

Seeing him sent a knife into her heart every time. She wanted to get away. She didn't want to remember, but she couldn't help remembering. And yet, through it all, through the pain, through the heartache, through the way she had lashed out, he had still taken the time to get her something. To show he cared. Wirnan was a lot like Ristin.

The thought made her burst into tears. And maybe that was one of the things she had been trying to run away from. He was a lot like him. There were many differences, of course, but the way he'd cared for her despite everything she had done, despite his obvious anger, he'd never tossed her out. He'd never hurt her. When she hadn't been so hostile, he'd even done little things to show he cared, small smiles, flowers...

Her tears flowed freely. Ristin had been like that. Even with their disagreements, he'd never raised a hand to her. He'd never struck her and he'd always been good to her. How much better than Ristin was Wirnan? After all, he'd endured so much more. She'd caused him so much more pain and yet there he was.

**Idiot. Idiot idiot idiot.** The word rattled over and over and over again in her mind. All this time she'd been saying to herself she was looking for freedom. That had been true at first, but then why hadn't she gone? After all, there had been chances. When she had gotten better, she could have even requested a ride from a dragonrider, maybe told a story to make one pity her so that she could be carried off. So why hadn't she gone?

That was the real question. She'd given herself excuses, but what excuse was there? Why was she sticking around for so long when she could have had her freedom long ago?

"Shaffit." The curse fell from her lips as her hand closed over the metal of the locket. She squeezed it so fiercely that when she opened, an imprint had been left upon her skin. Her finger traced the decoration etched upon the glittering surface, then reached up to wipe the tears before they could fall. "Idiot." She repeated again, then fell into a fresh frenzy of tears.

Control was slow in coming, but when it did, she took up the pictures that had been included. She chose one and placed it inside the locket. When she finished, the visage of Wirnan gazed from within its luminous frame. She sat and stared for some time, then closed the locket before she reached up to clasp it around her neck. Her hand reached up to hold it, then she rose and went to her bedroom. In the morning. In the morning. Her thumb ran across the deocrative surface as she crawled back to bed and pulled up the sheet. She would look to the morning.

Last updated on the June 27th 2013

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The Gift