Waking Up Is Hard to Do

Writers: Chelle, Miriah
Date Posted: 2nd October 2013

Characters: E'rae, Bahji
Description: Bahji finally wakes up
Location: River Bluff Weyr
Date: month 3, day 6 of Turn 7

Her brain was fuzzy when consciousness returned to her. It was the foggy of
fellis, but it muted the dull aches that seemed to come from everywhere on
her body. Her head was the worst. It pounded in time with her heartbeat and
she gave an immediate whimper. She definitely didn't want to lift her head
from the soft pillow. There was a pause in her thoughts. Pillow. Why did she
hurt? Where was she? Her eyes fluttered open and she shifted on her bed,
hissing as her body complained about the movement.

Fresh from duties, E'rae was there. He wasn't watching her just then, but
when he heard the noise, his head came up. "Don't move. It'll only hurt." He
didn't say much, letting her get her bearings. She could ask him questions
once she had woken all the way up. He also signaled a healer.

Her voice was hoarse and confused. "E'rae? Where am I?" She tried to sit up,
but the pain stopped her immediately and she slumped back down. Her
uninjured arm lifted weakly to search for him, reaching towards the sound of
his voice.

He took her hand to keep her still before sighing. This was hard-so hard.
Thank Faranth she couldn't see the look on his face. He looked like he'd
been hung out to dry and he knew it. Not like he'd been sleeping right
anyway. "You're in the infirmary. A few days ago, you were hurt-fell down
some steps." He didn't want to push her, but he thought it would be good to
know. "Do you remember anything?"

Her brows furrowed as she took in what he said and her hand tightened on his
own. "I fell." She frowned. "I remember falling. I tripped." She stopped and
then her hand flew from his to rest on her stomach. "The baby? It's alright,
isn't it?"

"Do you know what you tripped on?" He wanted to focus on that since people
tended to remember details clearly when less time had gone by. "Did you hear
anything?" E'rae also purposefully avoided saying anything about the baby
just yet.

"No. It just caught my ankle." The mentioned ankle throbbed dully as though
the mere mention was enough for it to want her attention. She tried to
think, but her brain was still foggy. Had she heard anything? But he hadn't
answered her question and fear curdled in her stomach. "E'rae?" There was a
plea in her voice, begging him to tell her that everything was alright.

"I don't know. The healers haven't told me. They can tell you. Now calm
down." He put that note of authority back in his voice that always came out
when he was calm and focused. He had to be strong for her and he knew it.
"They're taking care of you."

Scared, her hand trembled over her abdomen, but she nodded. "I need to know,
E'rae. Is our baby okay?"

He had just told her he didn't know. The healers hadn't told him. However,
he could guess that things probably hadn't worked out. "They haven't said,
Bahji. They were waiting for you to wake up. But I...don't think so. It's
okay though, you're alive and you can have others."

She went absolutely still except for the sudden clench of her hand over the
blankets on her stomach. She gave a sudden hiccup of breath and her hand
lifted to her mouth, her sob muffled. "I'm so sorry, E'rae..." Her eyes
closed tight. "I ..." Her hand covered her face. She had been clumsy and it
had killed her child. Their child. She tried to swallow her tears and her
grief, and only managed to make strangled sobbing noises.

He hated to hear that and to see it. Still, he understood her need to
grieve. "Don't apologize." He didn't tell her that it hadn't been her
fault-someone had done it to her deliberately. No, this was enough for her
to handle now. Still, in the back of his mind he wondered if someone would
have done it to her and their baby if she had not been blind and unable to
see them? Could he trust her to be safe if she became pregnant again? He
couldn't be there all the time to watch her.

Pulling her carefully into his arms, he made soft noises to quiet her down,
but he let her cry.

Even though he was careful, some of the movements hurt, but even laying
down, she hurt. But the pain was more than worth it as she felt his warmth
and buried her head in his chest. Her soft keens of grief overtook any
rational thought and she just clung to him.

Last updated on the October 5th 2013

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Waking Up Is Hard to Do