Flight Foreboding (2/2)

Writers: Avery
Date Posted: 10th April 2017

Characters: A'vel, L'pin
Description: A'vel comes to L'pin for advice about flights.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 10, day 2 of Turn 8
Notes: Mentioned: Alina, Cyradis, Kapera
Notes: Part 2 in the "A'vel's First Flight" sequence

"Are you worried about what to do during the flight? Afraid of losing
control of Tsogath and hurting her or yourself? Or are you afraid of what
you're going to feel and what will happen to your body?" the
Weyrlingmaster's Second asked.

"I'm not sure," he said.

"Well, there's really three components to a flight. The dragon's flight
lust and her mating, the physical consequences of the riders mating, and
the way that the rider feels about flights and sex. Are you concerned
about one of those, or all of it?"

"My-myself. I don't want to sleep with a rider. I don't want to have to
participate in - in this act!" A'vel shook his head violently. Now that
he'd spoken, the words began to gush out.

"I don't want to hurt her. I can't lose her, she's my everything. She's
the only thing that matters on Pern. But I'm so afraid to have a man touch
me and to - do things. And I have to for her. And…"

He took a deep breath. "I've felt the referred lust from goldflights. When
Riyanth rose," he added. "It's going to be so much worse when it's
Tsogath. I'm afraid of losing myself in her. But if I don't surrender to
it, doesn't that hurt her?"

"The more comfortable you are with how you feel sexually, the less alien
the flight lust can feel. It's more like your experience of desire, not
like someone else's being shoved into your mind. With a gold flight you're
feeling another dragon's lust. When you're a rider, that can feel
especially odd.

"In your dragon's flight, the lust comes across as a part of your emotions
like Tsogath is a part of your heart now," L'pin said. "If you're worried
about being drowned in the lust, it can be easier to contemplate how it
works academically it. Remember that it's not you having bad, dirty
feelings, but that it's a natural thing for her. I know I teach lessons
about not letting your dragon sublimate your feelings, but this is a time
when it could be good. She wouldn't want something evil, or wrong. This is
natural."

A'vel's shoulders were shaking and he was sniffling. He wasn't protesting
L'pin's words, or arguing. He also wasn't saying anything in acceptance,
either. So the bluerider risked pushing a little more, so he could offer
better advice.

"Have you experienced anything sexual on your own yet?" They'd advised the
weyrlings to, and many were happy to throw off restrictions as soon as
they were seniors. A'vel might also have had prior experience from the
Harper Hall or his other time at the Weyr.

"Some. And I don't fancy anyone," A'vel said quickly.

"I gave a few names of riders who can help young weyrlings practice at the
flight lessons. Let me write them down so you remember. I'd strongly
encourage you to experiment now, find what you feel more comfortable with.
If you own your desire, you'll find hers more natural," L'pin said.

"And how do I make sure she doesn't get hurt in the flight?" A'vel asked.

"There's a risk of physical harm if she overstrains herself, or if she
flies into an obstacle while evading. So you keep yourself reminding her
to fly smart and carefully."

"They say we can _lose_ them," the green weyrling whispered.

L'pin didn't want to lie to A'vel and say that it was completely safe, but
he'd hoped A'vel wouldn't think of that contingency. He was trying to
break through what seemed like rider reluctance, but he was hoping to
encourage A'vel to own his desires and have sexual experience. He wasn't
sure scaring him into submitting to a flight by telling him that he had to
or his green would die was the best way of handling it. But A'vel had
asked…

"There's always stories of a dragonrider who loses control during a
flight. She panics, she tells her dragon to come back. But her green is
caught up in the mating frenzy and she wants to be flying. So she comes
back, but the emotions are clouding both of their minds - back doesn't get
visualized properly - and she goes /between/ and doesn't re-emerge."

"Stories," A'vel said. "Has it ever happened?" Maybe it was something just
said to scare other riders…

"I was never at a Weyr where a flight that went like that, but I did hear
from a colleague at Rising Moons that a young green died that way in Turn
5. That's why I have the specifics," L'pin's face was sad and his tone was
grave. "Just stay with her through the flight and the fall, and don't try
to bring her back till they're done. I believe in your ability to stay
with her. You're a disciplined young man, and you and she will be fine, if
you just trust."

A'vel heaved a sigh. "I appreciate you talking to me about this. It must
sound silly."

"You're not the first green weyrling to be nervous about flights," L'pin
said. He thought about Alina, about how he would never ask how her flights
were going because of how much it would scandalize her - but he'd heard
enough from the rumor mill to suspect that it had not gone well. If she'd
begun to be more comfortable with Weyr life he would try sending A'vel to
her, but he suspected that she wouldn't be comfortable trying to help the
boy out. But that gave him an idea.

"And believe it or not, I've had to coach riders of male dragons who are
reluctant to have their dragons catch," he added, hoping that would help
A'vel feel better.

"At least they can make theirs not chase," A'vel grumbled.

"They can fight it if there's a reason like kin relations, but it's not as
easy as all the rumors say," the bluerider advised. "Take it from personal
experience."

"Good to know, I guess."

"If you're curious about flight feelings and controls, maybe you should
speak to another female dragon's rider about it. Try finding a green rider
you're comfortable with. Or maybe you'd feel better with a goldrider? If
not the Weyrwoman herself, then her Second. She might have advice about
safely controlling a dragon."

"I couldn't possibly -" A'vel started.

"Of course you can. They're here for that kind of advice." L'pin's tone
was encouraging. "Do some experience practice. Think about asking someone
who's been through flights. Or if there's someone you feel comfortable and
trust who rides a male dragon, why don't you ask them to have their dragon
chase? You might not wind up with someone who will turn into a weyrmate,
but a friend might be better than a stranger."

"And my door is always open if you need assistance," he added at the end.

"I'll think about it," A'vel said, finally looking up from his hands as he
stood up to leave. His voice sounded less tremulous. "Have a good
evening, Weyrlingmaster."

As the boy left the office, L'pin could only hope that his words had helped.

Last updated on the April 25th 2017

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Flight Foreboding (2/2)