Big Eyes

Writers: Miriah, Suzee
Date Posted: 16th March 2019

Characters: Cyradis, D'hol
Description: Reaction to the lost Weyrling
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 10, day 9 of Turn 9
Notes: Mentioned: K'deren, Saibra

Cyradis

D'hol

~*~

She didn't think. She didn't process anything more than that she needed
something as she walked down the corridor. She turned into the office
doorway and just stared with huge eyes at the man sitting at his desk.

"It died," she said barely about a whisper. "I couldn't..." and she
couldn't even finish the sentence. She'd been strong and helped the
others just like she was always supposed to.. up until the point where
she'd gotten back to Dolphin Cove and the one man who could truly
understand.

D'hol rose the moment she entered, wiping off a dusty bottle to pour a
finger's width of spirits into a glass. He picked it up, walked to
Cyradis, and placed it in her hand. "I know. Yumath told me." The
moment he had heard, he knew that she would be feeling a renewed keen
sense of her own remembered grief. He wrapped his arm around her
shoulder gently. "I know."

"It was just like ours," the memory had been buried deep but the first
cry of distress had awakened it again. "But I was strong. I didn't
crumble like..."

The memory of it was painful and harsh. She had been younger then, not
as experienced and wore her heart on her sleeve openly. Finally
wrapping his arms completely around her, he kissed the top of her head
gently. "You've always been strong, love." His voice was a murmur as
he closed his eyes, remembering. He and Yumath had had the awful duty
then and it still pained him to remember the lifeless body in Yumath's
claws.

She leaned into him and tucked her head under his chin, such a
familiar place to be. She drew comfort from his gentle and undemanding
embrace. She sipped from the glass and let the burn slide down her
throat before setting it down and wrapping her own arms around his
waist. "I don't even remember what I said to Saibra," she said as the
tears began to flow.

"It's okay, Cy." He gently rubbed her back, holding her close. "You
don't need to worry about that right now." He kept his tone soft, his
slightly roughened voice attempting to soothe some of her grief. "It's
okay." He laid his cheek on her crown and murmured softly. "Don't
worry. She'll be fine. You'll be fine." He felt the dampness of her
tears and felt his own heart crack; he'd never been able to stand to
see her cry, even when he had been angry with her. It pained him more
than she would ever realize or that he could openly admit to.

Her breath shuddered as she just let go of all the control she usually
held. Here in his arms at this moment she didn't have to be the strong
Weyrwoman for everyone around her. The emotions slipped their leashes
and she let them for a few moments before she tried to rein them in
again. "I'm sorry," she said as she finally felt the storm begin to
recede.

As she cried, D'hol murmured soft words of support into her hair and
continued the soothing rhymic strokes along her spine. That she came
to _him_, needed him, warmed his heart, even through the grief that he
privately shared with her. "You don't have to apologize for this. You
never have to apologize to me for this." He pulled away just enough to
kiss her brow and wipe her cheek gently with his thumb. "I'm here when
you need me."

"Thank you," she looked up into those deep hazel eyes. The gentle ones
she remembered from what seemed like another lifetime. "I can't even
begin to tell you how much I appreciate this D'hol." She looked back and
forth between his eyes. they were so close she could almost feel his
breath. She paused in an almost endless moment of unrealized
possibilities before she lifted up on her toes to brush his lips with
hers.

At the brush of her lips against his own, his fingers flexed against
her back to support her as he very slowly and carefully returned the
brush of lips. Every instinct and desire screamed at him to deepen the
kiss, to further it, and pull her flush against him. To take what she
so gently offered and make it more. But he didn't press her, despite
the urges; to push what she offered when she was vulnerable...Faranth,
he couldn't do it, but he couldn't pull away from her either.

She finally settled back down on her heels but searched his eyes
again. She knew he could have taken advantage of her kiss but he
hadn't. "I made the wrong decision back then," she said. "I thought it
was right at the time." she closed her eyes and stepped back but her
hands slid down his arms to hold onto his hands. "But I was very
wrong. I just want you to know that _I_ know that."

D'hol went still at her words and his throat visibly worked as he
stared down at their joined hands. His felt his eyes sting and to
blink quickly to control his immediate reaction to her words. He
finally had to close his eyes tight and take an uneven breath,
affected to the core by the simple words that he had longed for turns
to hear. He could carry those words, he realized, through what he
would have to do; they were a balm to him. He opened his eyes again,
took a breath and looked up at her. His eyes gleamed with eemotions that
he forced himself to restrain as he spoke softly. "Thank you, Cyradis."
He pulled a hand gently away and ran his fingers along her cheek, a
motion that felt so familiar from turns ago. "You have no idea what it
means to hear that."

Her eyes misted again and she squeezed the hand she still held. More
words weren't needed and they understood one another. Something had
broken in her when she'd come back from the hatching and he'd been the
one she needed to help regain her peace of mind. They'd shared this
once before and he understood without long explanations. She took an
involuntary shuddering breath then she nodded and reluctantly let go
of his hand.

She picked up the glass and tossed the rest off and smiled at him. Not
because she thought he'd drink it but because it was very good stuff.
"I'm glad you kept that bottle," she said.

One side of his mouth curled up and he offered her the bottle. "You
can keep it. I won't use it." He bent, brushed his lips over her
cheek, then stepped away. "I'm sure K'deren's worried about you." He
could offer comfort that D'hol couldn't. "But you can stay, if you
need to."

"Yes," she said. "I should get back to Panitath. She's not unaffected
by it either. Not that she really remembers specifics just the general
grief." Her eyes avoided his for a moment trying not to think about the
invitation to stay. "Thank you," she held up the bottle. "And thank Yumath
for me."

"Anytime, Cyradis. "

Last updated on the March 19th 2019

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