Not Defective (2/3)

Writers: Miriah, Suzee
Date Posted: 19th December 2019

Characters: Y'gel, Urlene
Description: Urlene finds out something amazing.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 13, day 22 of Turn 9
Notes: Mentioned: Lorican, Cyradis
Part 2 of 3

Y'gel

Urlene

Urlene stiffened and immediately sat up, a look of hurt mixed with
anger flashing in her eyes as she pulled her robe around her with
jerks of her hands. "That's not even the slightest bit funny, Y'gel."

He'd seen her turn that look on many people in the past but his smile
was warm and gentle. "Sweetheart, I'm not joking and would never do
that at a time like this. You really are pregnant." He could do the
quick calculation in his head and knew the possibilities. "It could be
mine or Loricans," he added gently. "Just over two months, I'd say."

She stared at him for a long time, his words slowly sinking in.
"That's... that's not possible. I can't..." her voice trailed off as
her hands slowly slid to her lower abdomen. "I can't have..." Pengwil
had tried over and over again to get her with child, nearly every
night, he'd tried and she'd never caught even after two turns. She'd
accepted long ago that she'd never bear a child. But to hear that she
could have what she'd once dreamed of but then gave up...Her other
hand flew to her mouth, fingers trembling and she caught a quick
breath of a sob as her eyes stung. "Really? Are you being completely
serious? You're sure?"

"Come here," he said and rose to gather her in his arms. She'd rarely
seemed so vulnerable to him and his protective and comforting instinct
suffused him. He carefully set aside his own elation at the thought
the child might be his and simply held her. "I am absolutely
positive," he said to the top of her golden head. "You're having a
baby," he murmured.

As his arms wrapped around her, Urlene broke down into sobs, one hand
covering her mouth in an attempt to stifle them, the other cradled
protectively over her abdomen. How? Pengwil had tried with her and had
gotten both of his mistresses with child during their marriage. She
had been so convinced, so certain, that the fault had been her own.
The knowledge that she carried a child, a baby, filled a deep aching
hole that she'd always tried to hide or ignore. Suddenly, irrationally
convinced he was wrong or it was a sick joke, she jerked away,
scrabbled for a stethoscope among the tools she had taken, slipped it
into her ears and pressed the other end against her belly and held
completely still, still hiccuping soft sobs. There is was, a sound she
had heard so often, but never from her own belly. a faint rapid
heartbeat. Her eyes lifted to Y'gel's and a look of pure joy lit her
face even as tears streamed down her cheeks. "A baby...I'm really
having a baby..."

"Yes," he reflected her joyful smile. "Maybe mine," he said and kissed her.

Overwhelmed with joy, she returned the kiss, wrapping her arms around
his neck. It wasn't until his words finally clicked that she pulled
away and stared at him, mouth parting in realization. She had lain
with Y'gel within a sevenday of her first night with Lorican. Either
of them...her face flushed, then paled. "Oh Faranth..." She exhaled
slowly. Y'gel was very weyrmated to a non-rider who he loved dearly
and Lorican was half a continent away. She had told him she
couldn't...she had told _both_ of them that she wasn't fertile and
there hadn't been any precautions. How was she going to tell him that
she was with child but it might not be his? How would Y'gel explain it
to Briata?

Y'gel wasn't a dimglow by any stretch of the imagination and the look
on her face gave him a very good idea for the direction of her
thoughts. "Take your time," he said. "You have months to decide how
you want to handle this. I would love to be this baby's father but
will love it even if I'm not. Though I do promise not to intrude if
you wish to make the choice to raise your child with Lorican as its
father." He'd figure out a way to tell Briata should he need to. "You
don't worry about me. You worry about you, alright?"

It was so much to think about and she promised herself she would, but
at the moment all she could really absorb was that there was something
precious nestled snugly within her. So, Urlene nodded and wiped her
eyes, then hugged Y'gel tightly again, burying her face in his chest.
"I can't believe it. I'm going to be a mother...I've wanted it for so
long and I always thought I never could."

As they'd grown together as friends, even before they'd become lovers,
they'd talked about many things including their pasts. She'd never
said it in so many words but he'd known. He smiled and handed her his
handkerchief. "I know." he said in his deep voice. He shifted and
pulled her into his lap just holding her. This was a huge emotional
storm and he just wanted to be here for her however she needed. "This
baby will be a very lucky child to have a mother like you."

It was also a relief to the secret shame she'd carried; the divorce
hadn't been her fault. She'd felt like such a failure at the time,
after putting up with Pengwil's embrace night after night and trying
so hard, only to be discarded. Thankfully, she hadn't had an emotional
connection to the man, else it would have been worse. "He tried every
night he could, Y'gel. Even when I didn't want to. He blamed me. Said
a woman that couldn't get with child wasn't a real woman." The words
burst out of her. "He was wrong. I'm not defective."

A chuckle rumbled up from deep in his chest. "If there's anything
you're not, love, its defective." One hand stroked her hair and her
back while the other just held her to him. Then he looked over at the
table. "Do you want to try any of that food or would you like me to
get you something else?"

Urlene shook her head. "No, the smell of the oil, it turns my stomach.
I should have realized." She finally gave a sniffling smile. "And why
I've been so tired." She rested against him, taking comfort from his
arms around her. "No wine either. I won't risk anything, not for this
baby. " She kept her hand over her lower abdomen, fingers stroking. "A
baby. My baby. I don't care that I'm not married. I'm not ashamed. "
She looked up and cupped Y'gel's cheek. "Thank you, Y'gel."

He smiled down into her eyes. "Of course," he smiled. "I do care
deeply for you. You do know that don't you?"

She nodded. "I know. And you should know how much I care for you too."
Her thumb stroked his cheek. "I just don't want to hurt your
relationship with Briata. If you never tell her, I'll understand
completely. She has to come first."

He smiled but also lifted a brow. "That is my call," he said. "You
don't worry about Briata. I am responsible for that part of this. You
do what is best for you."

"I know. I was just letting you know that I'd understand if you didn't
want to." What to do about Lorican was something else. She could admit
that she didn't know him as well as she knew Y'gel and didn't know how
he'd take the pregnancy. Despite their flow of letters, she feared he
might not take it well if there was uncertainty; he was craftbred and
had those morals. She also feared he'd leave his post, risk his future
and his goals. She didn't want that either. There was also still a
nagging doubt that he'd ever return otherwise and didn't want to use
the baby to force him into doing something he'd regret later. As Y'gel
had pointed out, it had only been a few days with him. "I will. And
what's best for the baby."

"Good," he smiled. "And you're going to go home at a reasonable hour
and get enough sleep." He grinned at her. "Right?"

She had the grace to look a little abashed. "As much as possible, yes.
Sometimes it won't be. You know that. Now that I know though, I'll
have to remind myself that I have someone else to worry about now."
She blinked. "And I'll have to let Cyradis know of course." She eyed
him with a rueful smile playing on her mouth. "You're going to be
keeping an eye on me, won't you?"

"Read my mind did you," he asked. "What else am I thinking," he asked
as something nudged her.

"I think I know you well enough to guess what you'd do." Urlene
grinned up at him. The emotional impact of realizing her pregnancy had
left her both ecstatic and tired, but the nudge under her lap couldn't
exactly be ignored. She'd refrained from sharing her bed with him
since Lorican had left, but she felt so close to Y'gel at this moment
that she felt the magnetic pull of him keenly. After becoming used to
sharing her bed with him regularly, to do without, even with her
emotional connection with Lorican, had left her more than a little
frustrated. Plus, somehow the man had managed tilt his hips to nudge
right where she felt the most need. She wiggled against the persistent
nudge. "Hm. I think that you might want to recreate how I might have
gotten with child?"

This time his grin transformed to something that would have done a
mischievous boy credit. "See, and now you've read my 'other' mind.
You know I can only think with one brain at a time right?"

That brought out a bubbling laugh and she looked down at where her
robe gaped open over her bare torso. "That's a myth, but I'll let it
slide this time. It's not like you don't have a distracting view right
now." She sat up just a little, shrugging off the robe to leave
herself bare. He wouldn't be able to stay the night with her, but he
could at least celebrate with her, and she wanted to celebrate the
discovery. Urlene pressed her lips to his, pulling his lower lip
lightly with her teeth before suckling lightly. "Take me to bed,
Y'gel."

Last updated on the January 4th 2020

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Not Defective (2/3)