Welcome to My Secret (1/2)

Writers: Devin, Halyonix
Date Posted: 17th September 2024
Series: Bronze and Blue Entwined

Characters: K'mai, I'serin
Description: Liquid courage causes consequences
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 1, day 5 of Turn 12
Notes: List-appropriate saucy times ahead

K'mai

I'serin

He had spoken to all of the Wingleaders after Threadfall.

He had reviewed every complaint, every compliment, every counterpoint to the arguments raised about what had happened that day. While everyone was in agreement that N’thal’s recklessness had cost I’lon’s life, it still felt as though every Wingleader was looking at I’serin as the progenitor of that mistake, even though he logically knew it wasn’t true.

The Weyr inhabitants dispersed to grieve in their own ways. There was a raucous party, a celebration of I’lon’s life in one space, while more subdued and private rituals took place elsewhere.

I’serin, alone in his office, got quietly and thoroughly drunk.

He went over every moment leading up to the accident, turning it over in his mind’s eye as if he could find a key that he had missed. He knew that it was futile. He knew that none of his ruminating would reverse the past. But it was how his mind _worked_. It gnawed at details like a bone, refusing to let go. Shells, he was still dragging up incidents from his childhood!

As the night deepened, and cognitive fatigue gave way to liquid courage, he finally decided that he was tired of being alone, hiding behind formalities and fears, thinking, always thinking, and why were others championed to be themselves and he wasn’t! **Issss K’mai alone?** he asked Aluneth. Even his mental voice was fuzzy. He really should just go to bed but he didn’t want to close his eyes, didn’t want to see it all again, didn’t want to think about it one more time.

Aluneth was slow, cautious to respond. }: Yes. :{

**Good,** I’serin thought back, staggering towards the office door. **See that it stays that way.**

}: Are you-- :{ Aluneth started to ask, watching his rider drunkenly haul himself aboard.

**Shut up.**

Aluneth said nothing more as he ferried I’serin to K’mai’s weyr, rumbling an apology to Sebeth for disturbing him. “K’mmmai?” I’serin queried, still keeping his voice somewhat hushed because it was rather late in the night and people were sleeping. Or doing things in their bed that weren’t quite sleeping but I’serin didn’t want to think about _them_, he wanted to be _here_ and _now_ and _not_ thinking.

"Weyrleader." K'mai was waiting just inside the ledge entrance. "Sebeth said you were coming." It was clear I'serin was taking this rough but K'mai was confused why he was _here_. They'd known each other since childhood, they were friends, but they'd never been particularly close.

"Say nothing," I'serin said as he stepped inside. It was obvious I'serin had been drinking by the glassy look in his eyes, the unsteady gait. "Say nothing, please," he softly pleaded, his hands inching close like he wanted to touch K'mai but was still scared. He closed his eyes, trying to block the fear and feelings. No more thinking about it. Just do it. No one would judge him any more than they already did. Just let him have this one moment to let go, be himself. Be I'serin.

K'mai reached out and gripped his hands. He had to say _something_ though. "Just tell me what you need." A shoulder to cry on, a blanket nest and a sympathetic ear, whatever I'serin needed to ease his pain.

He knew exactly what he needed.

Awkward and eager, as if the touch of the bluerider's hands had given him permission, I'serin drunkenly planted his mouth on K'mai's.

K'mai pulled his head back but didn't let go of I'serin's hands, blinking in confusion. "Uhh . . . I'm a man. And you're a bronzerider." Just how drunk _was_ he?

"I am well aware of the stereotype," I'serin grumbled, sighing. He had messed up. Again. K'mai's flirting had been just that, hadn't it? I'serin had overthought the whole thing, misread the signs, and here he was, drunk and holding K'mai's hands, tired of _thinking_ about everything, why was it all so difficult, why did he always have to hide behind formalities, why...

_Everyone_ knew what riding bronze meant and K'mai frowned for a long moment as he tried to make sense of what was happening. 'Stereotype' he'd said, after a terrible day, after getting drunk, after specifically coming to K'mai's weyr in the middle of the night and kissing him. Was a bronzerider, the _Weyrleader_ saying he was . . . "Maybe . . . maybe if girls can Impress blue, other things might be different now too?" He let go of one of I'serin's hands to reach up and cup his cheek.

I'serin let out another sigh, one like a feline content, as he closed his eyes and leaned into K'mai's hand. That simple touch wiped away his thoughts, brought him back to the _now_. "Say nothing, please," he said again. "Just...allow me to be here. As myself."

K'mai fought the urge to speak and nodded instead, then he leaned in to brush his lips against I'serin's. The bronzerider let out a soft moan. His hand flexed, then grabbed on to K'mai's shirt to steady himself as he leaned into the kiss, returned it tentatively to start and then hungrily.

The bluerider's mind was spinning with the fact that he was making out with the _Weyrleader_. But I'serin was also his friend, and clearly needed something to take his mind off what had happened today. K'mai kissed him deep, hands roaming along the bronzerider's back. Eventually he broke the kiss long enough to nod toward the bed, eyebrow raised in question.

I'serin let out a soft growl. "Yesss," he drunkenly purred. He felt like wherever K'mai had touched had turned him more alive. In hindsight, it may have been because of the alcohol, but for now, it felt _good_, like I'serin was shedding something that had always restrained him. He slid his hands under K'mai's shirt, along his torso, as he let the bluerider lead him towards the bed.

They pulled clothes off as they made their way toward the sleeping area. There was no question that I'serin was very into this and K'mai took a moment to admire him before tugging him gently onto the bed. Skin slid against skin as they tangled together on the furs. K'mai usually talked things out with his partners, but now he waited to see if I'serin wanted to lead or follow, if he wanted them to take turns, how fast or slow he wanted to go.

But for all of his rank, I'serin let K'mai take more of the lead. This was not an area he had experienced often, though he had studied and reviewed it in his mind late at night. Once again, theory paled when it came to application. While it didn't help that the bronzerider was drunk, he wasn't entirely useless. He eagerly drank in K'mai's kisses and explored the body offered to him. Finally, a body like his own. Aluneth might have relished the mating flight with Chioneth but I'serin had wanted to enjoy a male partner. _Finally_, he had that.

K'mai rolled I'serin onto his back and sucked at his nipple before starting to move lower. "Would--" He bit his lip. I'serin had said not to talk, so instead he gave him a questioning look and then started trailing kisses down I'serin's body. Incoherent but encouraging moans were all I'serin could muster. He threaded his fingers into K'mai's shaggy hair, urging him onwards.

It didn't take long for the Weyrleader to fall into a blissful, hazy mess.

K'mai kissed his way back up, his hands making slow, soothing strokes along I'serin's body. "You're more than welcome to stay. Relax . . . sleep," the bluerider said softly.

It was a _wonderful_ suggestion, I'serin thought. His limbs refused to move anyway and he could just...stay...relax...

"K'mmmai," he sighed as he drifted off to sleep.

Last updated on the September 21st 2024

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